FOUND

Wednesday, October 15, 2008 at 4:38am
It's past 4am and I'm cooking a french dish that my mom taught me how to make.We're so similar its ridiculous.

I'm not worried anymore.

I'm rather relieved. I'm always at my best when I'm on the edge of really losing it. I made my first pair of underwear tonight while watching a documentary on Jack the Ripper, I figured that Sweeney Todd was based on the story since the murders occurred on Fleet Street. There was another documentary about the internet and the creation of Amazon, it just reminded me of when I was 9 years old and I was the first one to have a computer and internet and I was hooked from then on.

I spent years in social isolation and being alone and reveling in that. Reading books, being elitist and not speaking to anyone,because we had nothing in common and there was no reason to waste time on them.

There is a sense of relief when I have nothing.When I'm homeless, jobless and loveless, I'm so happy and maybe its because there are no expectations and not too many people to have to deal with and it means no responsibility no commitment.

This is why living alone appeals to me;I don't want to clean up after other people.I just want to create all day.

Catwoman Speaks

Sunday, October 19, 2008 at 12:06pm | Delete
I had a moment yesterday, let me tell you about it.

So I'm walking down Clark Street to catch the bus and low and behold, I see a good spot. A Green Clothing Donation bin, with tons of crap outside. So I go through a bag, cause all the other stuff is wet and ruined and not interesting regardless. I found 6 designer purses and a pair of BCBG heels. So one of the purses is sorta ugly but it has a perk because it has blue vinyl in it, and I don't know if you know, but vinyl is about 7 dollars a yard and while there isn't much material here, I can still do something with it.

I take it with me as I meet Amandacera at the zoo and we met up with her roommate and got a brief tour, will go back soon I promise! I gave her a choice of what purses she wanted cause there are plenty and she picks this white nine west one and a smaller beaded one. We all go grocery shopping and then go to her friends house and then go back to her apartment. So I had a fun night in Logan Square took two trains to land me back in lake view. In between there was a massive delay on the blue line (thanks CTA) .... You make me hate public transit even more....

As soon as I got back I was so excited about the vinyl, I started making patterns and sewing rough stitches to get a better idea of the fit and where it would need to be sewn with the machine; I could hand sew it but I'm still missing a few pieces.

Habits

Things I tend to do out of habit: bite my nails(yeah it is gross). Yoga, exercise, drink tea, distract myself with trivial problems usually involving the opposite gender.
I think thats why I like dramatic/emotional people to make up for my lack of it.

I'm addicted to being happy, I don't like having bad days or being upset so I just don't do it sometimes, honestly my problems are pretty minimal and there isn't a reason to be overly upset.

I want to do a trip and make it like Thelma and Louise style. I also should make a movie about me and my life.



this sounds good

Spiced Apple Tea

Makes 8 servings
Start to Finish: 25 minutes

Ingredients
1 lemon
4 cups apple juice
2 cups water
4 inches stick cinnamon
1 tablespoon whole cardamom pods, crushed
1 teaspoon whole cloves
6 black tea bags (decaffeinated, if desired)
1/4 cup maple syrup
Thin apple slices (optional)

Directions
1. Use a vegetable peeler to remove strips of peel from half of the lemon; set peel aside. Squeeze juice from lemon.

2. Combine apple juice, water, and 1 tablespoon of the lemon juice in a large saucepan. (Save remaining juice for another use.) For the spice bag, place cinnamon, cardamom, cloves, and the lemon peel strips in the center of a 6-inch square of double-thick 100-percent cotton cheesecloth. Bring corners together and tie with a clean string. Add bag to apple juice mixture.

3. Bring mixture to boiling; reduce heat. Cover and simmer 10 minutes. Remove from heat. Add tea bags; cover and let stand 5 minutes. Remove tea bags and spice bag and discard them. Stir in maple syrup. Serve in mugs. If desired, float apple slices on top of each serving. Makes 8 servings.

so does this

Pomegranate Spritzers


Start to Finish: 15 minutes

Ingredients
1 cup pomegranate syrup
1 750 ml bottle fruity white wine, such as Riesling or Chardonnay (about 3 cups), chilled
1 cup sparkling water, chilled
Pomegranate seeds (optional)
Blood orange wedges (optional)

Directions
1. Add 2 tablespoons pomegranate syrup to each of 8 champagne flutes. In a 1-1/2- to 2-quart pitcher combine the wine and sparkling water. Pour wine mixture into each glass to serve. If desired, garnish each with pomegranate seeds and/or a blood orange wedge. If desired, add ice to the glasses.

2. Makes 8 servings

New Beginning

It's so easy for me to leave and start over but I'm doing the one thing that I am bad at. STAYING

I can't seem to sit still and build, I always need to change and do something new.
Well I've done all the new things I can think of and now I'm back at the beginning. Having learned a hard lesson. It's time to grow up just a little bit and build instead of destroy.

Go through with instead of come out of a situation.
Give up to choicelessness
Open myself up to a world of understanding I didn't know
Explore the new me whose walls have been left down
Whom cannot even recognize the reflection anymore

Andy Warhol Says, " You got your 15 minutes"

The original quote goes as the following, "In the future everybody will be world-famous for 15 minutes."

I went to the Andy Warhol Museum today and snapped a few pictures. Including things I wasn't supposed to :)



Then I walked downtown and got lunch and a Java Chip Frap so I could get a bunch of Itunes cards.

Went Bowling with Val and Maaz and went back home with Val and watched A Mighty Heart.

The previous movies we have watched together include: Third Wheel (terrible), Running with Scissors (not bad), The Pursuit of Happiness (Really Good), Brokeback Mountain (also terrible, really overrated and couldn't understand most of what they said)

And we have also been watching Rock of Love together lol

PJ Harvey just performed, Grow Grow Grow on Jay Leno it was awesome.

Update

Scratch that can't go to school right now its too expensive. I'm not going to slack off here but damn there must be a reason why this is so hard for me because when things work out thats because they are supposed to.

"We must respond to omens"

"It's called the principle of favorability, beginners luck. Because life wants you to achieve your Personal Legend"

"You must always know what you want"

"Language of Words"


I cannot live with roommates again the thought makes me shiver. I can't deal with this crap anymore. I have a job interview today and last night a really interesting offer came my way. I'm really thinking about it depending on its validity or not.

I want a job that requires me to travel a lot or at least takes me to new landscape.

New job needed
Budget

I expect too much of myself, I'm really hard on myself, I just want to be able to do everything, I have to learn patience.

I am going through a real transistion now, it seemed kinda half-assed before; I was pretty close but I couldn't keep the momentum going. At least I can recall what it was like to be able to feed myself and live well.

Coming up ROSES....

Bithday Massacre SHOW September 9th SUNDAY
METRIC September 25th TUESDAY

Yay shows

There was a party at the place I am staying at last night, it was noize/hardcore/beats etc. Good Stuff

Ended out on a good note.

Half the Battle

I had a very productive awesome day.

Today when I was at work a co-worker bought me a brownie 

I have been walking home most days and I really enjoy it, its really good exercise.
It’s a 45 minute/ 3 mile walk and I don’t mind it at all, especially since it’s been really nice outside.

Doing laundry tonight and did some yoga while listening to PJ Harvey.

Looking for Studios because I need to live alone after all the drama/crazy/weird/dirty roommates I’ve lived with.


Now I’m listening to The Cure-Disintegration, I haven’t listened to this particular album probably since I was in high school/early college. A lot of people say this is their favorite album but I don’t think it’s the best; I prefer Pornography or even Faith.

As far as reading goes; I am still reading, The Unauthorized Biography of Siouxsie and the Banshees, The Female Brain and I just started reading The Alchemist.

Eating Curry so YUMMY

I will be co-hosting an art exhibition in a few months.

More details soon and more things in the works!